Tag Archive: Ships

Haiku Review: All Is Lost (2013)

all is lostStarring: Robert Redford
Written & directed by J.C. Chandor

After his boat’s hull is damaged by a stray shipping container, a sailor finds himself lost at sea and facing his own mortality.

It’s like Life of Pi
but without the tiger and
all that faith bullshit.

Grade: A-

By Daniel J. Hoag
All Is Lost is playing now in select cities.


Haiku Review: Captain Phillips (2013)

capt phillipsStarring: Tom Hanks, Barkhad Abdi & Catherine Keener
Written by Billy Ray
Directed by Paul Greengrass

The true story of the hijacking of an American cargo ship by Somali pirates in 2009.

Finally a film
about pirates that doesn’t
involve Johnny Depp.

Grade: B+

By Daniel J. Hoag
Captain Phillips is playing now in theaters nationwide.

Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Kate Beckinsale, Ben Foster, Giovanni Ribisi & J.K. Simmons
Screenplay by Aaron Guzikowski
Directed by Baltasar Kormákur

A former smuggler goes on one last job to help protect his brother-in-law from a vicious drug lord.

Marky Mark smuggles
charisma (which means if it’s
there, he hides it well).

Grade: C

By Daniel J. Hoag
Contraband is available on Blu-ray and DVD on 4/24/12.

Starring: Jamie Bell, Andy Serkis, Daniel Craig, Nick Frost & Simon Pegg
Screenplay by Steven Moffat and Edgar Wright & Joe Cornish
Directed by Steven Spielberg

Investigative journalist and adventure-seeker Tintin teams up with a drunken sea captain to find mysterious scrolls that might lead to a lost treasure.

Finally we get
a fam film filled with guns, booze
and pirate-y death!

Grade: B

By Daniel J. Hoag
The Adventures of Tintin is playing in theaters nationwide.

Starring: Georgie Henley, Skandar Keynes, Ben Barnes, Will Poulter, Tilda Swinton, Liam Neeson & Simon Pegg.
Screenplay by Christopher Markus & Stephen McFeely and Michael Petroni
Directed by Michael Apted

In this third installment based on the novels by C.S. Lewis, Lucy & Edmund Pensive return to Narnia with their unpleasant cousin Eustace and join the adventures of King Caspian aboard the ship The Dawn Treader.

Like so many faiths,
all illusion, no magic.
Metaphor hammer!

Grade: C

By Daniel J. Hoag
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader is available on Blu-ray and DVD on 4/8/11.