Tag Archive: Love

Haiku Review: Her (2013)

herStarring: Joaquin Phoenix, Scarlett Johansson, Amy Adams, Rooney Mara & Chris Pratt
Written & directed by Spike Jonze

In the not-so-distant future, a lonely man develops a romantic relationship with his artificially intelligent operating system.

Admit it, after
watching this you tried to have
phone sex with Siri.

Grade: A

By Daniel J. Hoag
Her is playing now in theaters nationwide.


Haiku Review: Frozen (2013)

frozenStarring: Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel, Jonathan Groff, Josh Gad & Alan Tudyk
Screenplay by Jennifer Lee
Directed by Chris Buck & Jennifer Lee

When her sister’s magical powers trap their kingdom in an endless winter, young Anna sets out on a quest to find her sibling and bring back warm weather.

Buried under the
polar vortex of Disney’s
princess formula.

Grade: C+

By Daniel J. Hoag
Frozen is playing now in theaters nationwide.

blue is the warmest colorStarring: Léa Seydoux & Adèle Exarchopoulos
Written by Abdellatif Kechiche & Ghalia Lacroix
Directed by Abdellatif Kechiche

Adèle is a young woman whose life is transformed when she begins an intense romance with Emma, an attractive artist with blue hair.

So explicit it
brings new meaning to the term
“three-hanky movie.”

Grade: A-

By Daniel J. Hoag
Blue Is the Warmest Color is playing now in select cities.


gatsbyStarring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Tobey Maguire, Carey Mulligan, Joel Edgerton, Elizabeth Debicki, Isla Fisher & Jason Clarke
Written by Baz Luhrmann & Craig Pearce
Directed by Baz Luhrmann

A mysterious millionaire seeks to rekindle a romance with the woman he loves, even though she is now married to another man.

Luhrmann wouldn’t know
subtlety if Daisy mowed
it down with his car.

Grade: C+

By Daniel J. Hoag
The Great Gatsby is playing now in theaters nationwide.


Haiku Review: This Is 40 (2012)

This is 40Starring: Paul Rudd, Leslie Mann, John Lithgow, Megan Fox, Albert Brooks & Melissa McCarthy
Written and directed by Judd Apatow

As they both turn 40, struggling married couple Pete and Debbie must figure out how to balance romance, careers, parents and children.

I’d have rather watched
two hours of Albert Brooks
in This Is 60.

Grade: B

By Daniel J. Hoag
This Is 40 is available now on Blu-ray and DVD.


to rome with loveStarring: Woody Allen, Alec Baldwin, Roberto Benigni, Penélope Cruz, Judy Davis, Jesse Eisenberg, Greta Gerwig, Ellen Page & Alison Pill
Written and directed by Woody Allen

A series of comedic and romantic vignettes set in the city of Rome.

As in his films, it
can be easy to fall out
of love with Woody.

Grade: C

By Daniel J. Hoag
To Rome with Love is available now on Blu-ray and DVD.


It’s Oscar weekend, which means it’s once again time for The Haiku Review to reveal its best films of last year. And thanks to Ben Affleck, waterboarding, vengeful slaves, a French pillow, and one exceedingly incompetent fast-food restaurant staff, 2012 turned out to be a fantastic time at the cinema. So without further ado, here are the ten best movies of the year. Continue reading


Haiku Review: Amour (2012)

amourStarring: Jean-Louis Trintignant, Emmanuelle Riva & Isabelle Huppert
Written and directed by Michael Haneke

An elderly man struggles to care for his wife after her health begins to deteriorate.

It’s like Up, but the
first scene lasts two hours and
there are no balloons.

Grade: A

By Daniel J. Hoag
Amour is playing now in select cities.


Haiku Review: For a Good Time, Call…

for a good time callStarring: Ari Graynor, Lauren Anne Miller, Mark Webber, Justin Long, James Wolk, Mimi Rogers, Nia Vardalos, Kevin Smith, Seth Rogen & Ken Marino
Written by Katie Anne Nayon & Lauren Anne Miller
Directed by Jamie Travis

Odd-couple roommmates operate a phone-sex business.

Pretty much the best
time one could have that involves
faking orgasms.

Grade: B

By Daniel J. Hoag
For a Good Time, Call… is available now on Blu-ray and DVD.


hotel tStarring: Adam Sandler, Andy Samberg, Selena Gomez, Kevin James, Fran Drescher, Steve Buscemi & Molly Shannon, David Spade
Screenplay by Peter Baynham and Robert Smigel
Directed by Genndy Tartakovsky

Dracula opens a monsters-only resort, but finds his world upended when a human finds his way in and falls for his daughter.

This Hotel should be
condemned and all residents
deserve to be staked.

Grade: D+

By Daniel J. Hoag
Hotel Transylvania is available on Blu-ray and DVD tomorrow.