Tag Archive: Romance


Haiku Review: Her (2013)

herStarring: Joaquin Phoenix, Scarlett Johansson, Amy Adams, Rooney Mara & Chris Pratt
Written & directed by Spike Jonze

In the not-so-distant future, a lonely man develops a romantic relationship with his artificially intelligent operating system.


Admit it, after
watching this you tried to have
phone sex with Siri.

Grade: A


c2014
By Daniel J. Hoag
Her is playing now in theaters nationwide.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1798709/?ref_=nv_sr_1

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Haiku Review: Frozen (2013)

frozenStarring: Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel, Jonathan Groff, Josh Gad & Alan Tudyk
Screenplay by Jennifer Lee
Directed by Chris Buck & Jennifer Lee

When her sister’s magical powers trap their kingdom in an endless winter, young Anna sets out on a quest to find her sibling and bring back warm weather.


Buried under the
polar vortex of Disney’s
princess formula.

Grade: C+


c2014
By Daniel J. Hoag
Frozen is playing now in theaters nationwide.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2294629/?ref_=ttfc_fc_tt

Haiku Review: In a World… (2013)

In a worldStarring: Lake Bell, Rob Corddry, Ken Marino, Demetri Martin, Fred Melamed, Nick Offerman, Michaela Watkins & Geena Davis
Written & directed by Lake Bell

A female vocal coach attempts to break into the male-dominated voice-over industry.


As long as it’s a
world where more women get to
direct films, I’m in.

Grade: B+


c2013
By Daniel J. Hoag
In a World… is playing now in select cities.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2294677/?ref_=nv_sr_1

blue is the warmest colorStarring: Léa Seydoux & Adèle Exarchopoulos
Written by Abdellatif Kechiche & Ghalia Lacroix
Directed by Abdellatif Kechiche

Adèle is a young woman whose life is transformed when she begins an intense romance with Emma, an attractive artist with blue hair.


So explicit it
brings new meaning to the term
“three-hanky movie.”

Grade: A-


c2013
By Daniel J. Hoag
Blue Is the Warmest Color is playing now in select cities.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2278871/?ref_=nv_sr_1

Thor 2Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, Tom Hiddleston, Anthony Hopkins, Christopher Eccleston, Zachary Levi, Ray Stevenson, Idris Elba, Rene Russo, Kat Dennings & Stellan Skarsgård
Written by Christopher L. Yost, Christopher Markus & Stephen McFeely
Directed by Alan Taylor

Thor must rely on his dangerous and untrustworthy brother, Loki, to help stop an evil Dark Elf from destroying the universe.


Since when does Asgard
look like Rivendell and fight
Dark Elves? #wheresgollum

Grade: B


c2013
By Daniel J. Hoag
Thor: The Dark World is playing now in theaters nationwide.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1981115/?ref_=nv_sr_1

Haiku Review: Blue Jasmine (2013)

Blue JasmineStarring: Cate Blanchett, Alec Baldwin, Sally Hawkins, Bobby Cannavale, Andrew Dice Clay, Louis C.K. & Peter Sarsgaard
Written & directed by Woody Allen

A New York socialite suffers a nervous breakdown and moves in with her lower-class sister after her husband is imprisoned for financial fraud and their assets are seized by the government.


Blanchett is the queen,
but you’ll just be surprised that
Dice Clay doesn’t suck.

Grade: B+


c2013
By Daniel J. Hoag
Blue Jasmine is playing now in select cities.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2334873/?ref_=sr_1

way way backStarring: Liam James, Steve Carell, Toni Collette, Sam Rockwell, Allison Janney, Maya Rudolph, AnnaSophia Robb, Rob Corddry, Amanda Peet, Nat Faxon & Jim Rash
Written & directed by Nat Faxon & Jim Rash

On vacation with his mother and her emotionally abusive boyfriend, a shy teenager begins to come out of his shell after he befriends the employees of a local water park.


Although, most older
guys who friend kids at water
parks are pedophiles.

Grade: B+


c2013
By Daniel J. Hoag
The Way Way Back is playing now in select cities.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1727388/?ref_=sr_1

Haiku Review: RED 2 (2013)

red2Starring: Bruce Willis, John Malkovich, Mary-Louise Parker, Helen Mirren, Anthony Hopkins & Catherine Zeta-Jones
Written by Jon Hoeber & Erich Hoeber
Directed by Dean Parisot

A team of retired CIA operatives must track down a weapon of mass destruction that’s been hidden for decades.


Keep giving Helen
Mirren guns and camouflage,
I’ll keep paying you.

Grade: B-


c2013
By Daniel J. Hoag
RED 2 is playing now in theaters nationwide.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1821694/?ref_=sr_1

eastStarring: Brit Marling, Alexander Skarsgård, Ellen Page, Patricia Clarkson, Jason Ritter & Julia Ormond
Written by Zal Batmanglij & Brit Marling
Directed by Zal Batmanglij

An operative for a private security firm is sent to infiltrate an eco-terrorist group known as The East.


That True Blood guy gets
naked and people will do
anything for him.

Grade: B+


c2013
By Daniel J. Hoag
The East is playing now in select cities.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1869716/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

gatsbyStarring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Tobey Maguire, Carey Mulligan, Joel Edgerton, Elizabeth Debicki, Isla Fisher & Jason Clarke
Written by Baz Luhrmann & Craig Pearce
Directed by Baz Luhrmann

A mysterious millionaire seeks to rekindle a romance with the woman he loves, even though she is now married to another man.


Luhrmann wouldn’t know
subtlety if Daisy mowed
it down with his car.

Grade: C+


c2013
By Daniel J. Hoag
The Great Gatsby is playing now in theaters nationwide.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1343092/?ref_=sr_1